When someone requires constant care it often can be overwhelming for the family caregiver.
For the different types of caregiving check out our blog called: Phases of Caregiving.
People are quick to offer support in the beginning, but sometimes you may not even know what you need help with.
And by the time you figure it out, you might feel like too much time has passed to ask.
Hint: Most people want to help, it’s okay to ask for help even if they didn’t initially offer help.
Each caregiving situation is unique. Nevertheless, there are some typical tasks that could be beneficial to consider asking for help with.
When you do become a caregiver it can be really hard to ask for help. But asking for help can make a big difference in your life and in your loved one’s life.
Be ready when people say, “Let me know if you need anything”.
Having a list handy can help ease some of your stress.
In the list below there are some common tasks that several long term family caregivers face.
When you think about adding people to the list, try to think of their strengths.
For example, if someone is reserved having them call or text family providing updates may not be the right fit. However, they might excel at sitting and talking with your loved one for an hour or two.
I will admit in my family we haven’t done a good job with pairing tasks to people’s strengths in the past. It was much more the random and chaotic pairing.
In listening to Jennifer Fink’s podcast called Fading Memories, she mentioned paring the task to the right person. And seeing I loved being organized, I created a common list and people placements pdf’s for you and for me when I require it again in the future.
Use the ones that fit your situation, skip any that don’t apply and add your own.
- Notifying or updating Family and Friends on Surgery/ Hospital Stay / Situation
Often there are several family members or friends who want to know how things are going. Sending each one text is time consuming and draining.
If there are lot of people who want to be updated considering setting up a CaringBridge page. CaringBridge is a non-profit that offers free webpages to help family’s make one updated post and then everyone who is connected to that page can see the update.
- Taking your loved one to appointments
Having a plan of who is going to take them to their appointments, physical therapy or medical rehab can lessen the stress for you.
- Picking up or ordering groceries
Delivery of groceries is great if that is an option, but otherwise asking for help to get groceries can be a great time saver.
- Meals for the caregivers
Figure out if you are willing to have people drop off meals if people ask. it can be hard to accept help, but even this little bit can be helpful in lessening the stress of being a caregiver.
If people offer to cook it’s okay to request a different day for them to drop it off. And it’s okay to ask them to just drop off the food if you don’t have the bandwidth for a visit. Just be clear that it’s not them but you just don’t have the energy for a visit.
- Meals or snacks for the loved one
Depending on what is happening they may not be hungry for a meal. Having individual fruit cups, applesauce, pudding or yogurt can be a great ways to give them something small to eat.
When asking for or getting meals/snacks keep in mind any dietary restrictions.
- Sitting and talking with your loved one for an hour or two
In many instances of long term care, the person becomes more and more house or facility bound. Having visitors is a great way to break up their day. And if they can’t be left alone this can give you a break to run errands, do household tasks or more importantly take a nap. It’s okay and you have permission to rest too, even when you don’t feel like you can.
- Picking up any medications or medical items
A lot of times there are constant medications or medical items that have to be picked up from the pharmacy or store. Having someone do this simple task can actually be a big deal for the caregiver.
If you have the option to have medication delivered, that would be great too. But that isn’t an option for everyone.
- Setting up their pills
Depending on their mental processing ability they might be able to set up their own pills, but there might come a time when they require assistance. Having someone (usually a family member at first) who is detail oriented is a great person to ask to help with this task.
- Being the point person for their care team
When someone requires intense caregiving there are multiple people, teams and Dr’s that all have to be coordinated with. Having one person and a back up person to be the two main contact people help keep all the care on track.
- Bathing or Sponge Bath
As care gets more involved there will usually have to be someone to help your loved one bath. Maybe that is you, but for this task it might be possible to have a home health aid person come in. They are trained to help minimize falls or injury while bathing.
- Dealing with Insurance, Finances, or Schedules
Dealing with Insurance, Finances and / or schedules can be frustrating for anyone let alone someone who is starting to require some care. If you can figure out who is doing what before it is needed it can save a lot of time and headaches down the line.
There are probably more items that could be included, but this list is meant to get you started. The PDF has lots of blanks rows for you to add your specific required tasks.
